Friday, January 30, 2009

You might be a birder if.....


I'm up at the cabin for a few days but wanted to leave you with some bird humor.












You might be a birder if....

Someone yells "Duck!", and you look up and shout "Where?"

Every time you practice your bird calls thinking that you are alone, someone pops up from out of nowhere.

Vacations are planned to maximize the number of life birds.

You criticize television programs and commercials that depict a bald eagle but play a red-tailed hawk call.

People stop and stare when you pish at the shrubbery at the local mall.


You might be a birder if you know the real name for shopping center pigeons.

Lunch breaks find you driving to check out your favorite hot spot.


You might be a birder if you want to see just one more warbler before lunch.


You might be a birder if you tell your friends you saw 78 birds today even though you saw 600.

Your spouse says, "It's either me or the birds," and you have to think about it.

On sunny days you hop in the car, crank up your tape of bird calls, and drive like crazy to the nearest mountain where the thermals are great for soaring hawks.

You pay a neighbor kid $20 to roll on a carcass and lay still while you search the sky for vultures.

Clouds take on the shape of birds, and you can distinguish male from female, and adult from immature plumage.

A machine squeaks at work and you describe it to maintenance as sounding like a black-and-white warbler.

The first time you meet your future in-laws you demonstrate the courtship dance of the woodcock, replete with sound effects.

You spend fifteen minutes preparing dinner for your family, and thirty minutes mixing and placing seed for your birds.

You wake up your spouse at 5:30am and exclaim, "Is that a phoebe I'm hearing outside the window?"

Preparing for trips to visit out-of-state relatives involves contacting local birders, securing local bird lists, and buying the appropriate Lane's Guide.

You identify calls of birds in the soundtracks of television shows and movies.

You're willing to fight with anyone who criticizes your optics.

You participate in hours-long discussions about the pros and cons of using a certain field guide.

You lose friends, and perhaps even your spouse, from fighting over the pronunciation of "pileated."

You spend most of the day on Saturday, after getting up at 4 a.m. making a five-hour drive, in near zero degree weather in snow and sleet with wet feet and inadequate clothing, looking for an unusual bird, and then exclaim "YES!" with a big grin on Monday morning when someone at work asks you if you had a good weekend.

You are the only one in the room who doesn't think "Prairie Chicken" and "Sapsucker" are funny.

You have trouble following movies, because whenever they have a scene with birdsong in the background, you try to ID all the songs and then lose track of the plot.

Answering "yes" to any of these questions qualifies you as a birder.

*The following birding humor is credited to the following site:
http://www-personal.umich.edu/~bbowman/birds/humor/index.html

39 comments:

Eve said...

These are so funny Shelley and yes, so true!!

Mildred said...

What an enjoyable read this morning. Thanks for sharing this and I hope you enjoy your time at the cabin. Have a fun weekend.

Tina said...

omgosh!! I've been bitten by the bird bug..and so soon.

These were very funny and I did enjoy them even tho some of them confirmed behaviors I have adopted and didn't realize!!

Richard said...

Those are so funny. My favorite is the pidgeons in the parking lot and the kid on the canvas.

Daisy said...

LOL! Those were great, Shelley!

I do have to comment though....
people stop and stare when you do WHAT? at the shrubbery at the local mall?.......oh..... "pish".......never mind, I thought that said something else for a moment there. ;D

Ms. ~K said...

Can you hear me laughing in Georgia? Have a wonderful time at you beautiful cabin.
Kit

Cathy Clementz said...

Shell, PRICELESS BIRD HUMOR!!

Hope you are having a sunny day at the cabin! It is sunny in Newberry!

Deborah Godin said...

High hilarity!! I guess I "am one" several time over. That red tail/bald eagle one gets me going every time!

Chris said...

Yes yes..
A wonderful photo of a bird that I would really like to see one day.... Funny behaviour

Betsy from Tennessee said...

Oh how cute, Shelley... I love 'em ALL--and they are so TRUE.

I do spend more time preparing dinner for my birdies than I do for us!!!!

Enjoy your cabin. I know you will. ALSO--enjoy your lunch with Denise.

Hugs,
Betsy

HANNIBAL said...

Funny! ...and guilty! Great photo too!

Heather said...

Thanks for sharing this Shelley. So many of the points on the list hit home! I'm especially guilty of hearing a particular bird in the wee hours of the morning and having to get up to see it with my own eyes (especially if it's a bird sound I don't recognize, or rarely hear!).

NCmountainwoman said...

Lots of good laughs here! Thanks

wendy said...

This one is my favorite - "You pay a neighbor kid $20 to roll on a carcass and lay still while you search the sky for vultures."

Jenny said...

YES!!!!!!! (-:
Specially the 5 hour drive one!

Ruth's Photo Blog said...

I guess I'm a birder.I said 'tes' to more than one.I love being a birder and all that goes with it.
Blessings,Ruth

Kallen305 said...

LOL Shelley. I answered yes to more than a few of those. Thanks for posting this. I have never seen it before and it's definately a keeper.

Leedra said...

Well, all your visitors are going to qualify on this list. Does it count that I am leaving on vacation on Sunday and the only thing I have put in the car so far are all four of my birding reference books?

Love this post.

Leedra’s Photos For Fun

Leedra’s Greeting Cards

Photography By Leedra

jalynn01 said...

Well! I think I might be a birder! I answered yes to many of these questions. Thanks Shelley, for a fun read. Have a great time at the cabin.

Olde Tyme Marketplace said...

That was a great post....funny but true!! LOL!!!
Beth

Bird Girl said...

Uh-oh! I had to answer yes to WAY too many of those statements ;-)

But you will get a kick out of this...I was going to do a post called you know you've been blogging too much when you look out your window and see a dove and say to your husband, "Hey! There's Bob!"
That is a true story - I did it last week - SEE what you've done to me Shelley! :-)

Mary said...

LOL! I'm not good on birdsongs, but I know I'm a birder anyway by some of the other things :-) I'm not sure whether it is hilarious or scary to think of all the birders raising up when someone yells "Duck!" I'll be heading off to Tucson soon and already have my sister looking up places to take me birding :-)

Sandy said...

hahahha, I recognize a few of those in myself. Funny post!

KathyB. said...

Very funny, and true ! My Hubby is likely to drive off a road one of these days because he visually follows all the birds he sees outside the car window, and he seems to steer where he sees! Birds are a major distraction for him.( me too when he's driving)

Jayne said...

Cute!!

Nick S said...

Oh sop true :-) Thanks for posting that Shelley !

Shellmo said...

Bird girl - I am still laughing over your comment!!! ha,ha,ha!!

letspaintnature.com said...

I guess I'm a birder....I agree to many of those, how funny! Wonderful blue jay pic...I love their loud calls, I can hear them on the next block!
Chris

Mildred said...

Me again! Thank you for your sweet comments and I appreciate your support and prayers during this time of testing for Nalley. Your friendship is certainly a blessing to me. God bless.

Stacey Huston said...

Have a great time at the cabin Shell..

troutbirder said...

Shelly... this was too good. I thought of sharing with my spouse but Im not sure she would see the humor in some of them

Jessica said...

These are great! And what makes it so funny is that I can relate to so many of them. Thanks for putting a smile on my face.

Dorothy said...

Shelley, I can identify with lots of these so I guess I'm a birder;-)

Naturegirl said...

I am a sure birder!I feed the birds before myself!

Nature Nut /JJ Loch said...

ROFL, Shell!!!

The cloud post is my favorite but I love them all.

You're at the cabin. WOOT!!!

I had a magazine request for a photo submission and have been busy but am back on the blogging track.


Swing by and check out my Snow Lady feeder. The birds have started landing on her. :D

Hugs, JJ

fishing guy said...

Shelly: some of those are really funny.

RuthieJ said...

Guilty as charged Ma'am!
Only I wake up the spouse at 2:30 AM to hear the Great-Horned Owl outside the window!

Kathiesbirds said...

OMG, I have it bad!!!!! I'm always trying to ID birds and their calls on TV and in movies! And I happened to note in a recent post that the AZ Cardinals football team insignia is incorrect since they depict the cardinal with a yellow bill instead of a red one! This was so much fun to read!

Mary said...

I wanted to put a link to a cute "duck!" sketch here, but am having trouble figuring out how to get you to the right post at this blog. You will have to scroll down a few, but they are all good.

http://sketchedout.wordpress.com/category/animal-idioms/